Baby, It's Cold Out There

Ok, the temp thingy is reading 19 degrees. Brrrr. I believe it, I just came in from the feeding all my animals. It's really 19 degrees, I wore my jamma bottoms layered with my rubber boots and HUGE coat and gloves and it STILL felt like 19 degrees. LOL. We have a frozen chicken, but since the rabbit is inside we stuck the frozen chicken in the rabbit cage where she is forced into shelter. LOL.

I'm proud of my boy, Rowdy-Mator stayed in his barn last night so he is less iced over than yesterday afternoon. This morning he was out trying to run laps. When I look out our back door there is a wooden fence between him and me and all I ever see is his bangs flapping. You know he's out and about when you see his bangs. Just a weird tidbit. He kind of wanted to leave the yard with me and I explained that since I was headed back in the house he couldn't come with me, he was pretty sure he could.

The goats were fine, they make their babies stay in most of the time. So they are smart, of course Lexi and Tiny Tim wanted to come with their Mommy but I said no. I would but the extreme changes in weather could give them pnuemonia. I do not want that, I would die if I started losing my babies. I was really worried about going out this morning because it was so cold and iced, I was scared I might have lost something but everything seemed fine, just the goat side chickens and Roo are iced over but under their stiff iced feathers are dry so I guess they will be OK, Roo Roo was out and about strutting his stuff, he's nice so far. But one chicken (maybe a small Roo???) would rather attack me than look at me. It's so onry, it's not everyone just me. What gives? I'm the one that feeds you, LOL.

Well, It's nice and iced over out there. Like even the street is solid white, it reminds me of one year when I visited Misty in Kansas and it started snowing really bad so I decided to venture out and head south, get closer to home. Kansas is crazy it snows like 3 feet and they scoop it to the side and the roads are clear. The driving is almost normal because they can bulldoze their roads. I got to Kansas and was headed to visit Brad and Lorinda. I was driving a Mitsubishi Montero Limited, it was the DREAM vehicle, my brother had wrecked my car 2x and the city truck that hit it last covered the rental. So I was in Heaven driving that thing. I'm glad I was in it, I hit about 30 minutes outside of Sand Springs and the road was WHITE, the was a valley on one side and the road was hit downhill, I was terrified, never driven in snow or ice in my LIFE. I literally got in line with a million bigrigs and followed their very slow trek down. I have never in my life been so scared, well maybe when I have to drive in rain storms. But I was barely creeping in that line of trucks and I was watching cars and pickups go over the side over and over. Get to the major highway and traffic had worn down the dead center of the highway and you just got in that groove and went, there was no stopping I finally got to my hotel and SLID in. I checked in and asked if there was a store or food nearby I was starving. NOPE. I survived that evening and night on Little Debbie snacks that is all the hotel had. It was horrible. The next morning I was feeling braver so I crept over to Lorinda's and had breakfast then went back to my hotel to await church time, made it to the church and back to the hotel. LOL. I rode with them the rest of the time, I had an extra day and a half vacation because NO ONE was leaving the Tulsa area. I was so proud of myself though for making it and not falling apart. It's in times like that you learn how strong you are. When obstacles are put in front of you that are your worst fears and you either face them or fall apart. I did it. Now don't ask me to volunteer to do it again, I've been in too many ditches in rain and ice with my Dad.

If the ground is wet I will drive but I'll fight anxiety and panic attacks until I reach my destination. I'm better than I used to be, I used to have to use an inhaler because of the attacks, now I just deep breath and give the steering wheel a death grip. LOL.

It's icy so it brings the memories of my experiences on ice, perhaps I should write about my experiences with water. LOL.

Headed to help Mom cook breakfast, since this is a ice day we are laying aside diets and having fried eggs and bacon, yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Camdon Update #8 Our Lubbock Weekend

Here are a few pics I took this weekend in Lubbock.

Regina and Camdon. Poor thing she's exhausted.

Camdon looking much better
Look at that blond hair, he is sleeping
Nana (my Aunt Brenda) and Camdon

Aunt "Winna" as Daylan calls Mom, LOL.

Tana (Me) and Camdon, he is so tiny. Makes your heart break that he is so sick.

Mom, Brenda and Regina in the Game Room at the Ronald McDonald House.

Ronald McDonald staff invited us to stay for dinner. A group had donated BBQ and Cobbler and it was wonderful. THANKS!!!

Kaleigh having some BBQ. YUM, she isn't quite sure what's going on with Dada, Momma and Camdon. She was NOT enthused about the drives.

Daylan and Myself at dinner. It was very good. He is so sweet and very concerned about his baby brother. He "likes road trips, they aren't scawree" LOL. He would watch out the window and say "Look I see the road trip". Too adorable.

One of the hallways in the Ronald McDonald House. There were quilts everywhere gave the place a homier feel.

This is on side of the kitchen at TRM House

The there side of the HUGE kitchen.

This is the pantry and freezers.

I forgot to take pictures at our hotel. LOL. Only me, I'm such a dweeb but how would you know? The biggest bar in town was attached to the hotel. LOL. It wasn't too bad though. We will always laugh about the fact. We drove around to the "front" and I was like "Oh dear this is a bar the hotel must have been the next buiding down there". I turned the corner and NOPE we were at the right place. There was no parking and I will always get teased. But at such a good rate, who cares, really!!!

Camdon Update #7

Camdon is doing good today. He's a miracle!!!

Camdon Update #6

More good news today. The doctors did another xray of Camdon's lungs, yesterday he had the huge mass of phlegm that would take awhile to go away. Well, we have a God that can. The doctor's said the mass was MIRACULOUSLY gone. That was great news. We know it is a result of all the prayers going up on Camdon's behalf. My God is an awesome God and He knows just how to get our attention and still show His goodness!!!!

We enjoyed dinner at the Ronald McDonald House today. I do know I will be donating to that Charity in the future it is an awesome organization that is a huge help to families from out of town. I plan to donate some of my time to help with chores and such. I learned tonight while watching the kids there that churches and people wanting to volunteer for a good cause donate their time and come in and do chores for certain rooms. Each room has chores to take care of each day and it gives them a break.

I plan on learning how to donate toys and books to them also. They had books and toys galore, but some where well used and kids videos, looked like everything ever put out. LOL. I was so impressed with them. The common rooms give the families a place to share and support each other. It is a great place.

Camdon Update #5

GREAT NEWS!!!! Camdon is ready for a regular room. There isn't one available right now but as soon as there is he will be there. We are all so excited. Brenda called and said she wanted to just jump up and down but didn't think she should. I said go ahead they will just look at her crazy. LOL. Thank everyone that is praying for Camdon he is doing better, not well by any means but so much better.

Camdon Update #4

So this isn't really an update.

Camdon has RSV. It is an upper respritory virus, it's the cold that doesn't go away that everyone around my town is passing around. Thankfully I didn't get it. It's not bad for healthy people but sickly people and small children it's serious and babies under 6 months it's critical and preemies it's fatal. In Camdon's case he has lots of phlegm in his lungs that has to come out before he will be better.

He also, I think, had a bronchial infection. I can't remember all that Brenda said about that. But basically his not breathing episodes were from the RSV. Babies don't breath out of habit their bodies think it through with each breath. That is why little babies sleep so much because their bodies work hard at breathing. Around six months old they start doing like us and breathing without thinking about it. When babies under six months get sick they are likely to get tired and stop breathing because they are tired. That is what is going on with Camdon. So he had the ventilator while they boosted his little body to be stronger.

They are giving him drugs like caffiene type stuff to give him energy and help him breath on his own. Last night the nurse tricked him into drinking his meds, LOL. She dipped a bottle nipple in sugar water and when he started sucking on it she started sending the meds in and he took them all. We were all cracking up, he got tricked BIG time.

I tell you what I respect and look up too those doctors and nurses. they have some stressful jobs. They deserve some big rewards. Well the nice ones like last night and not the mean ones. LOL.

Hope this answers the questions of what Camdon's illness is. Feel free to ask about it.

One other thing. Last night we were talking to a family with a 11 month old baby in the hospital and we were telling Cammies story and how we have people praying and we believe that is why he is doing better already. The man asked that we pray for I think the name was Draken. It's amazing how times like this in a Children's hospital people are reaching out to anyone to anywhere for help. With small kids like this they feel helpless. It's sad to see all the babies on IV's.

Well, it's breakfast time almost here so I'm headed out.

Camdon Update #3

Camdon is awake Awww, Chris and Camdon talking

Ok, this is funny Mom and Brenda's maiden names are Cone, this whatever it is said Cone. Hilarious part is Brenda was born in Tulia which is just north of this thing. My real grandfather was born in Wichita Falls and had family in Tulia so we wondered and discussed the fact, what if that was family. Hmmm, we know nothing about the Cone's except that Richard Cone was George Luther Cone when he was born. So that was kind of cool.

Well, we are sitting in the hotel I reserved for us. LOL. It had good rates and looked Ok, LOL. We got here and it has the BIGGEST bar in the whole city of Lubbock. People are partying. Very interesting. One thing you don't have to be all quiet. LOL. It's not a bad place though. Our window looks out onto the inside courtyard and it's nice.

Camdon is doing much better. He is off the ventilator for now and off the feeding tube. He is awake and looking around. They did xrays today and he has a large mass of phlegm in his right lung. He still has a while to stay in the hospital. I got to see him tonight and he looks so much better but it's so sad because he is so little. But there is a baby in the Critical Care that is smaller and it also has RSV. That stuff is bad on little ones.

One family said RSV is a 2 1/2 month stay. We are hoping Camdon will beat the odds and get out sooner.

Tomorrow we are going to get to see the Ronald McDonald House where Regina and Chris are staying.

I got to go in and see Camdon tonight when we got into town. He looks so much better. But watching his little body working so hard to breath is heartbreaking. He is off the ventilator for now and no feeding tube

Camdon Update #2

They gave Camdon a breathing treatment this morning and he is alert now. They removed his arm restraints and he is trying to sit up so things are looking positive right now. They will start trying to remove the ventilator this afternoon but said it could take several tries to get him totally off of it.

We are so thankful for the good news. I know it's all the prayers that are going up for Camdon.

Camdon Update #1

Camdon is taking some breaths on his own. The ventilator is "helping" when he is too weak. That is good news. We are heading out tomorrow for the weekend. I'll being posting updates on here when I'm at the hotel.

He had a mean nurse, boy was she rude, but that is OK, she messed up and got in big trouble in front of my cousin. Hehe, what goes around will come around. She had the babies doses too high and stuff. She needs to go!!

There are so many people inquiring on how he is doing. Rather than type the same message in all the different places, I'm going to put updates here and you can read and comment on them.

Regina and Chris were very thankful for all the prayers going up for Camdon.

Taniss

Camdon Hopkins

I'm holding Camdon at Christmas Almost a month later, he's sick :-(

Chris' bother and sister in law had twins 3 months early and one passed away so they went to Plainview to be with them and for the funeral. The first day they were there Camdon got real sick and ended up stopping breathing. They rushed his to the ER and he was limp and blue. The nurses grabbed him and ran, his oxygen level was 2. Not good. We jumped in my car at 11:30 at night and flew out to Lubbock as fast as I could drive. We got there at 4:30 in the morning and got to go in and see Camdon. He looked better and seemed to be breathing OK as long as he didn't wake up and cry. So after being there for a while we headed to Chris adn Gina's hotel room and got a couple hours sleep. Chris brought Daylan and Kaleigh to the room and we hung out, packed all their stuff up and checked them out of the room since they wouldn't be needing it. Then we went to the hospital and they were doing the "surgery" to put him on the ventilator and the feeding tube. That took all day, once they could see him they went back and did that and Mom went back and prayed for him. Then we headed back home with the kiddos.

Today I got a call this morning and he wasn't breathing on his own at all. We were all worried but then this afternoon Brenda called and when they turned down the ventilator (or however that works) he took a breath but couldn't finish it. The doctors said that was VERY good news.

If you are a praying person please pray for my aunt and her family and even our extended family. We are all hopeful but still worried about little Camdon. I believe they said he was a month old today. So happy one month old birthday today.

We love Camdon and we are rooting for him. We know he will pull through our God is AWESOME. So many people are praying and we are so very thankful.

It's Friday

Oh hum, it's freezing outside. Too cold to be out with my animals so I'm having to do this horrible thing called Clean. I hate being stuck indoors. I love being outside doing anything, mostly with my animals though.

I just got my bookshelf once again straighened up. I have so many books. Sometimes I dream of opening up a library of sorts that only carries christian books for the girls. LOL. I think you could say I collect books. In cleaning up I ran across some I've never read. LOL. They are living on my bookshelf and I never read them, how sad is that? Maybe it's an addiction. Hello, my name is Taniss and I am a bookaholic. Bookaholics anonymous. hehe.

I have stumbled across a new author that I am in LOVE with. His name is Randy Singer and her writes Christian legal thrillers. Now some of them are scary but I find that they are based on the truth regarding the legal system. I enjoy them and my Dad even reads them. So see they aren't just all sappy and all.

I am serious though it seems sad that I have books everywhere. LOL.

I'm off to workout, I will be skinny someday, NOT. LOL. Quite laughing it wasn't THAT funny.

What generation am I?

Ok, so I've been really searching my heart in recent days. I was raised in a old time pentecostal church. There was a deep power and anointing on that place. I was just a kid but I recall the prayer meetings, Bro. Milam and my parents would get together and pray. I used to love listening to Bro. Milam pray, he prayed like God as sitting there with him, like we talk to our best friends. He used to tell God stories about his kids or a hunting or fishing trip. He used to facinate me with his prayers, even as a teenager before he passed on I would catch myself forgetting to pray because I would get caught up listening to him. He was an awesome man, I'll never forget him wheeling around the church in his wheel chair or hearing him laugh in prayer.

I remember my Memaw and Sis. McFall and the prayer warriors that they were. Used to you knew when the spirit just started to move you would hear them start whooping, like indians, (LOL) and out in the aisle and around the church they would go. They weren't sophisticated or proper but they had a serious walk with God.

I remember prayer meetings where people would get so caught up in the spirit the ushers would have to go bring people out of the prayer room into the church. I remember walking with my Dad across the parking lot to the prayer room and going in and people would be shouting and jumping and praising God. Dad would just take one by the arm and here we would go to the church. Across the parking lot and into the sanctuary and he would walk them into an aisle, let go and back to get another one. People would be stumbling around like they were drunk. Worship service would be awesome people dancing in the spirit. The choir would get up to sing and the anointing would be so heavy upon them. That was Pentecostal worship. I can remember nights where the power of God would be so strong and their would be a mist in the air. Not literally but it would look that way and our church didn't own any fog machines. LOL.

My family would get with other families at the prayer room and get to praying and the next thing you knew someone would get up and start shouting, I was always a little worried about getting stepped on. You can't hide under alters they aren't that big. But then someone would go put their arm around another person and begin to pray. There was such a deepness in God.

I remember one night at choir practice we got to singing a song and we weren't praying or doing anything other than the normal practice routine and all the sudden a presence swept into that building and at the same time everyone begin to weep and speak in tongues, next thing you knew people were shouting and running and jumping. It wasn't anything worked up it was the power of God.

Miracles were something that we would see, I hated missing church because if you missed a service you would miss someone being healed or filled with the Holy Ghost. I remember someone (I won't mention names) but they would walk the pews, we had one man that rolled head over heals and I can't tell you how many times I saw someone roll in the floor.

The choir would sing and the anointing would come on us and it got to the point you couldn't stand there anymore or you would go crazy and off the platform one would go and then another until there would be only a few to sing, sometimes the musicians would start shouting and no music. LOL.

We had "after" services, we called them second services. Someone would be praying after everyone was gone and the few remaining would go over to pray with them and the next thing you knew you it would be 11 or 12 o'clock at night. LOL. I can remember sitting on a pew and not caring what people thought about me, just wanting more of God than I had before. It was so real.

I miss those times, I miss those services. It's like we are scared of the power of God. Pentecostal's have been know for years as tongue talking holy rollers, yeah we might talk in tongues a little but we sure can't carry the title of holy roller. Might mess up our clothes or hair.

I'm sorry, I want that power back, that deepness in God. I heard a sermon years ago in Kansas on Generation Translation. The minister (I can't remember his name) begin to share how in the Apostolic/Pentecostal people there is a cycle of generations. He said the first generation is founders and they have to search it out and find it for themselves. They pass it on to the second generation but in the "translation" something gets lost, so the second generation makes up for the missing pieces and seems to work out OK. Problem is the same thing happens to the 3rd generation. A little bit more falls through the cracks. So that they don't have the real power, they don't have that strong anointing and so they fake it, make it look right. Perform so people think everything is OK. The forth generation is a dangerous place because they become a first generation in the cycle and they either embrace the first generation or they reject it all together. They see the 3 generation pretending to have it together and they want something different and either they turn their backs all together and walk away from it or they will embrace it and begin to search to the truth, search for the anointing.

In the Bible it talks about Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and they same cycle really kind worked in them.

I want to have the real deal. I don't want to pretend. I've been so burdened lately with the fact that my walk with God is becomign all about how I look, how I sound, people push to make it about us. But folks I just want to go back to it being about Him. I have been praying for God to change me, put that fire back inside of me. I'm tired of never being changed, never really having that breakthrough that I need. Thing is I'm learning this is a lonely place.

I pray that God brings that deepness and that anointing back in my life. Where I'm real, I don't have to put on a show but it's real and coming from the depth of my being.

Change is scary and as I pray I ask God to lead me and show me His ways. It's not the easy road that is for sure. I told my brother Sunday night on the way home from church (we were on the phone) they say you know you are doing right when the Devil fights you. The promises God has given my family scares the devil. He knows if we ever rise above this hell he continues to put us through he is in trouble so he will continue to fight. But my family is getting tired of this and in Jesus Name we are going to do what we know is true!!!

Just thinking...

So I've been doing lots of thinking the last few days. Lots of stuff on my mind. I'm making a major decision to me. One that will affect me in a big way. There are few things I enjoy more that my books and music. OK, maybe my laptop, can't do without that. LOL. So I have to make a decision. Sometimes there are things in our lives that we love to do but certain circumstances remove the joy from doing things you really love and you have to wonder if you have the desire to keep on.

I want to make the right decisions, how to know what to do?

T'was a PARTY!!!

Ok, so I just got home from Julie's birthday party. HAPPY BIRTHDAY Julie!!!! We had a blast there was 6 of us, Dusty, James, Robert, Julie, Stephanie B and ME. We played Catch Phrase and somehow even with the guys acting stupid the beat us 2 to 1. WAH!!! Then we played spoons, that was a hilarious. We kept shifting the direction and boy did it get confusing on both games. Then we ate some cake and sang a lovely rendition of Happy Birthday in about 6 different keys. hehe. It was a fun, just be yourself time. The mexican food was awesome!!! Oh, we tried Masterpiece but that bombed just because the guys were being weird, in their weird guy ways. LOL. So we played with Julie's hermit crabs. They are so cool and their little house is all decorated up with different shells, really neat.

Julie and i have more in common, besides our white cats, LOL. We collect the little boxes and such, the designer/decorating kind. Pretties in life is what they are.

Well, I've got to get some sleep. My vitamins work wonders on giving me energy but sometiems I have a little too much energy and then I have a hard time falling asleep. I shall though, good night one and all.

A Brand New Year

Well, this year is off and going. I've been working on this blog before the first but couldn't get what I wanted to say to come out on paper. So, hopefully you can take a weeks work and make it come together and understand it. If not don't worry about it I know what I'm saying and that is what matters.

I don't usually make new year resolutions. My opinion is they are just made to be broken so if I vow to lose weight I shall gain it, you get the drift. However, this year is different and so I've decided to make a few resolutions. I have been trying to be more active (horse wanting to take walks helps), eat better (ground turkey, turkey bacon, etc is very good if you want it to be) and refocus my walk with God.

The healthy and active parts are easy with Dad's health issues they are no longer a SHOULD do, they are now a HAVE too. So that part is happening rather I like it or not.

As sad as it seems, it's the God part that is harder. In todays society God has become something of a reverent object we worship but we don't touch or he might get broken. That is really how I'm feeling. It's like swimming up stream. I have become very discontent with my walk with God. I'm longing for something I've lost and can't find. I long for that power and spirit that I used to feel. I was recently talking to a friend about it and she expressed the same thing. She said it's like somewhere deep inside there is something crying out for more and we aren't sure what's missing. You go to church where everyone seems happy and content and you wonder if your going crazy. I want so much more and I've had it and lost it. I want it back.

I've made some changes in my life this year already. I've been teaching Sunday School and I quit. I've lost my focus and I'm losing the feeling that I care. So the only thing I know to do is just focus on God.

I'm tired of performance making up for the anointing. I had a friend recently write a blog (which she will hopefully soon be resending to me) and in it she asked where the Pentecostals have gone. She is a backslidder that I grew up with, yeah, she grew up as a Apostolic Pentecostal. She called me all upset when she was writing the blog. She said she visits Pentecostal churches and they are as poised as the Baptist, she asked where the aisle runners, holy rollers and such have gone. She wasn't aiming it at me, actually she was stirred up over a church she and I attended for a very short time that has since gone charismatic, I guess, they cut their hair, wear makeup and shorts, etc. Still say they are OK, if they are or aren't is their business but for my friend, that is serious. She said "Taniss, I do those things but I am honest and say I'm not right with God. Where will I go when I want to find God?" I really didn't know what to tell her.

That blog was several months past and she is having to find it for me. It haunts me that my friends can say that. I know I am not what I used to be. I miss the all night prayer meetings and the "after" services. You don't see people drunk in the spirit anymore, or miracles, we get one from time to time but I remember days when I couldnt' wait to get to church to see what God was going to do in that service. I'm disturbed at how OK, I am with it. It actually scares me. I haven't been able to figure out what to tell her. I don't know where we went. I see the change but not sure why. Until I read Bro. Ballestero's article on Intercessory Prayer. It all clicked for me. I plan to do whatever I have to, to get back to that place with God. I cried when I read it, it is so true and it all makes sense. I sent the article to my friend and told her perhaps this is our answer.

I have tons of backslidden friends that I am believing God is going to save, but they are looking and searching for a power that we used to see and it's gone. I don't know where it went. Maybe it's true we don't need faith anymore, we don't NEED God. Guess I'm "Old School" but I need God, I need His spirit back in everything I do. I wonder where those old time prayers gone, ones where you pray until you break through.

It is so true we've learned how to worship without His presence. We have life so good so we don't really have to depend on a higher power. If it's Intercessory Prayer I've lost, I really do miss you. Everything Bro. Ballestero wrote in this article speaks to my heart, it's so true, I'm working on a blog of memories in church. I'm so hunger for more of that deep power of God. It's missing and so many have never felt it and don't even realize it's missing. I was talking to my brother recently, I belive, if our generation doesn't get to a place in God where that power comes back my niece and nephews will never know what it is. I'm longing for more, whatever that means I have to do in life, I want more. We aren't supposed to "look back" but I am because I've lost something and I have to find it. I'm desperate for it!!!

Intercessory Prayer, We Miss You!
By Martyn Ballestero Sr.

This is just a line to let you know how things are since you’ve gone. It’s not the same without you, nor will it ever be. Although our lives seem shallow and empty when you’re not here, we’ve learned to make up for you in other ways. We’ve learned to live without you.

We now run the aisles, leap for joy, jig to the music, sing catchy choruses, and tap our feet in time to the rhythm of the drums. We use sticks, banners, black lights and our sign teams do a tremendous job acting out recorded music. We’ve learned to worship without you.

The prayer rooms are mostly silent now. Those that do go there, for the most part, come away dry-eyed. A lot of praying now is chanting and singsong style. That’s how we know we’re in the groove. We pray memorized phrases that come automatically. We love what we call Prayer Walks. Most of us don’t even close our eyes anymore during prayer. We just walk and pray while we look around. We pray because it is required. No one prays till they break through anymore. We just pray till our ten minutes are up.

Family altars are almost unheard of now. You can’t imagine how busy we are and how hectic our schedules have been. It’s unbelievable. We get up in the morning and never stop till we go to bed at night. We do try to make it to church most services and get some praying in there during the service, but prayer at home is kind of out of the question. That may be another reason you haven’t heard much from us.

Oh sure, we still believe in prayer, as such. But not very many of us are anxious for you to come back. (You were always the polite type, you know, never forcing yourself on anyone. You never came uninvited. You only left because you were ignored.)The sad truth is you’re not really needed anymore. You see, most of us have hospitalization insurance now. (It sure takes away that old desperate feeling we use to have.)

So now, there’s no need to pray more than the few minutes it takes to drive to the Emergency Room. Also, we don’t have to ask for our daily bread like we used to. We now have better jobs with good benefits and government programs to fall back on.

If we lose our jobs, there is always Unemployment or Welfare. If we retire or become disabled, Social Security now supplies our needs. So, you can see, we’re doing OK. Other things have filled the void in your absence. Sure we miss you. But we’re getting over it some how. Actually, we’re too busy to entertain you right now, even if you tried to come back. I hope you understand.

We are having revivals now without you. It’s not hard. The pastor fasts and prays, along with a couple others. The evangelist preaches mostly just to sinners now. Most of us try to get to church in time for the first song or two. We justify the fact that the number of new converts is down. Yes, there seems to be diminished conviction, less lasting victory, fewer miracles and many young people are backsliding. We agree, however, that it’s not us that are at fault here; it’s just the times we’re living in. It’s like this everywhere.

As your friend, I’m writing this to you, knowing how much it must hurt you to have folks say they miss you… and yet in their material and intellectual progress, they’ve weaned themselves away from the haunting memory of you.

What hurts, I know, is that we were children you personally raised. You were always there when we needed you. (But now… we don’t.) You taught us about faith. You taught us about miracles. You taught us about a move of God. You taught us about revival. You taught us about how to touch God. Thank you for that, but you see, this is a new day and we are trying to go to the next level. Our services are structured differently now.

Do you know… can you believe, that now when you are ever mentioned in church, everyone gets real quite? They all feel guilty I’m sure. It’s like they experience a momentary twinge of guilt while they consider their part in your disappearance. Once in awhile some even get misty eyed when we talk about the old times you shared with us. But all that feeling vanishes along with the pizza right after church.

No, Intercessory Prayer, your coming back really wouldn’t work right now. We’re too blessed. We’re doing too well. We’re comfortable. In your day, you served your purpose, but the sentiment of most today is that we can manage OK without you now. We’ve got better clothes, cars, homes and prettier and bigger churches than ever.

By the way, do you remember all the folks of yesteryear coming into the sanctuary with red-rimmed eyes? Remember the baggy looking knees in men’s’ suits? Remember all night prayer meetings? Remember the depth that was in worship? Remember when sinners couldn’t sit in their pews any longer, and would run to the altar? Remember when you could feel unity and brotherly love? When folks helped bear one another’s burdens? When the saints didn’t watch the clock? When they could hardly wait to enjoy the after service atmosphere, praying around the altar until the wee hours of the morning? Boy, those were to good old days. We call that “Old School.”

Well, it’s pretty much all gone now. But you ought to see our new Hammond C-3, our new drum set with a cage and everything. Electric bass guitars are just awesome and the electric guitars too. We use Praise Singers to help cover up the fact that our congregations don’t sing like they should or used to. We let them do most of our worship for us. Our Choirs just do terrific on the new style songs. Old saints don’t like the new songs much, but the younger crowd seems to like them. Many music directors don’t even know some of your old favorite songs, so they don’t get played much anywhere.

You would be proud of our church buildings. Carpet on the floors, there are pews now instead of benches and they are padded too, besides. The arched beams are beautiful, we also have the loveliest of imported chandeliers. Our pastor has polish too. He doesn’t preach long. We are more concerned about sermon length now, than content. Our pastor spices up his sermons with cute sayings… but I guess that’s progress for you. “Win some, lose some.”

Speaking of “lose some”, we’re losing a surprising percentage of our young people. An unbelievable number of marriages have gone on the rocks. Many lives have been in jeopardy. But that’s to be expected I guess. Teenagers seem to be at war with their parents and want to dress more and more like the kids at the public school. Our youth meetings may not have much in the way of prayer, but we have great icebreakers, skits and games.

We have plenty of medicines nowadays to help our aches and pains. What more could we ask for? Sure we miss you, but I guess we really don’t NEED you right now.

I hope you’re not offended. I don’t mean for you to be. You’ll always have a special place in my memory. You were very kind and generous to me. You sure got me out of some hard times. I can’t thank you enough! Still, this is a generation now that doesn’t know you at all. Your coming would probably scare them.

Remember the night when my mother sat at the piano bench and you joined her there? Remember how she wept and groaned in the Spirit and slumped to the floor during the revival service and how some tried to call the ambulance because they thought she was sick? They never knew you and her were talking.

That’s what I mean. A good many never got to know you well. And most never knew you at all. Those that knew you personally have waited so long to talk to you that they are now, to say the least, embarrassed.

So while we are trying to work out our feelings about you, and see where you might fit into our plans in the future, you might try your luck someplace else. Try Brazil, Ethiopia, or how about the Philippines? You might have better luck in Third World Countries, or behind the iron Curtain. You might even luck out and find someone to talk to you in some little storefront on the other side of the tacks. Surely someone somewhere needs you.

We’re terribly sorry, Intercessory Prayer, we miss you, but we really don’t NEED you… right now!

Teresa & Katie stayed for Christmas Weekend

Christmas with Mom's Side of Family

Christmas Afternoon with Friends