All the posts on what this year will hopefully bring and the blessings from the past year. I'm not willing to discuss the last year and if this year doesn't get better?? Lord help me!
2019, 2020 & 2021 brought unimaginable loss.
Then 2022? I'm not sure I even experienced that year, I must have just autopiloted through it. I think that was my brothers cancer and I honestly, sitting here, couldn't tell you much about that year other than, I guess I survived it. Oh, yeah, I broke my right ankle, second surgery on the second broken ankle.
2023? I'm not even sure where to start with you. We have gone through my brothers first heart procedure, his open heart surgery, mom's first surgery, her second surgery that required 2 hospital stays. 2023 you took me to the brink that night as I sat in my mom's hospital room in tears because I had never seen her so sick and it seemed they forgot her, I had to find nurses to get her help and they seemed to not even know who was in charge of her room. She was in so much pain, you took me to the brink that night. Thank you Ruby for taking my late night texts and just talking me through that night when I really thought fear was going to overwhelm me. For being willing to jump in your car and drive to Dallas, I think that is why I called you, I didn't want anyone there. Sitting in that bathroom to not disturb mom and being so scared I was losing her and knowing for the first time in my life I was so alone. I had sat in that hospital all day telling everyone I was OK because that is what I've always said. I'd just never sat alone.
Aunt Susan falling and sitting in the ER again. I'm not sure if it's all the hospitals, ER trips or just being the 2 year anniversary of Dad's death but 2023 you left me utterly exhausted in every way possible. Today I learned I'm experiencing burnout, I don't think it's my first rodeo but most definitely the hardest. I've never experienced this level of exhaustion in every way. They have 8 "symptoms" and I said YES to every point. 2023 I am so glad you are behind me. Yes, I was blessed, God was good, He kept me but 2023 you left scars no one can see. I'm glad 2024 has arrived and I'm hoping and praying she is better to me!
