OK, I'm officially scared. LOL

I hate doctors, I'm not talking about a mild dislike, I out and out HATE them. They scare the living daylights out of me.

I tried to renew my BP meds and they renewed them one more time and that is it. So now it's getting down to time to renew and I HAVE to go to the doc to get my script. ARGH!!!

See, my BP is perfectly normal as long as I take meds at least everyother day and there is no major stress in my life. But BP was not the only problems. I wish they would go away and I could go on the way I have for years with no insurance. See I can't get insurance, it's not a option through work and I literally can not get it on my own, I am overweight and am a risk because of health issues like high BP. So they refer you to Texas High Risk Insurance and there you get to pay $500 a month and get nothing, basically they will cover very small things and your deductibles are sky high, it's just not plausible.

So since my County isn't set up for people like me, I did the only thing I could think of and took a test run through the local free clinic. It was humiliating and I went home and bawled my eyes out. It was the most embarrassing thing I've ever endured and the problem I went for they agreed all the symptoms were there and when blood work came back ok, that was that. My problem wasn't fixed it just wasn't that. It was so frustrating. I called Medicaid and even at my part time pay I wasn't eligible for any type of help. So I could use a Dallas address and go to Parkland, but that is so scary to me. I've never had to do this. Now that I NEED, medical attention it is almost impossible to find without moving to a different county?

Cancer is just one of the things that is very prominent in my families genes and I know I have to go but could we not make it possible so that people like me could go to our regular doctor without it costing me out the kazoo??? Sigh, so here goes my journey in finding out what is wrong with me.

I hate looking up symptoms because it will scare you out of your ever loving mind.

So, I will head out to my regular doc who hopefully can give me options. I can only hope.