I Need a Dentist. LOL

As much as I hate doctors. I have GOT to get back to the dentist. My tooth is killing me. It's got to come out. I hate losing teeth, you know they have a very important job. I have nightmares about my teeth falling out. LOL.

Well, I'm getting my vacation. I'm going to Granby Colorado for a whole week, the week after the 4th of July. Do you know I can not wait. I'm sure we'll go see Rocky Moutain National Park, but for the most part we have NO plans. It is going to be soooooooooo great.

Well, I thought our company was leaving next Friday. Please pray, they have problems that only God can fix for them. As of yesterday those plans were falling through. I am just praying that God will work it out.

I got a new phone. I went to buy an iphone and came home with a Samsung Eternity. I love it. I can't get as many apps but I don't use that many of them anyways. I'm not sure how the MP3 player is but I'll find out this week. If it's not good I have to decide if I want to return the phone (per my salespersons advice if I don't like it) or just buy a ipod. We'll see.

Well, I'm taking some pain pills and headed to bed my head is killing me. We had church this morning. To lunch and then to Rowlett for my cousin, Kaleigh's graduation party. Then to Forney to see my cousin Alaina's new house which is gorgeous. I learned the Balch Springs/Mesquite area is too crowded and caotic for me now. My head hurts.

I LOVE good Pentecostal choirs!!

Thinking 'bout Things

OK, so my thoughts.

I'm still not happy with people being here but I'm better right now in handling it. I have been assured this is temporary. Supposedly until June?? We'll see, I hope so.

I just let things build inside of me until I can't handle more. Am I wrong in my feelings? I really want answers. Like I told me Mom yesterday I want life to be peaceful and happy. Her opinion is you have to make your own happiness, it's a decision. Peace follows. Thoughts?

Do I really turn everyone against her? Is it only me?? Maybe so, I don't know. Mom feels like we are what she fights to do what God has called her to do.

Sunday night's sermon was awesome. I think I'm in one of those rounds and I try to keep going but I don't know... How do you know for sure??

Mom says I make it all about me. Maybe I do.

I just am not comfortable with people living with me like this. I can't help it. I guess some people can do it and some can't.

Maybe it's the struggle I have to deal with. I go through life so confused feeling. I'm just don't know. Where is the balance?

It's like I told my Mom yesterday, I don't trust anyone. I am very aware of what happens when you allow yourself to trust people, they will almost always fail you.

Mom feels like she failed us because we don't share her burden. Are we supposed to always just do what everyone tells us to do?

Argh, guilt. I hate guilt trips.

Lazy Day

Sooo, it's a lazy holiday. I'm getting ready to head out and swim. All these windy cooler days and this one is still and very hot. LOL. The pool still has some issues and it's a bit cloudy but it's fine for swimming, though a little cold. LOL.

So my Mom and I had a very long talk today sitting in my car in a parking lot with ice cream melting in the back seat. Communication is a good thing, not that it resolves much other than to verify I'm a very unhappy person. But hey, every little bit counts. So perhaps it's true and I'm a horrible person. I'm just not sure, I admit I have issues. LOL. So we'll see what happens in the future. I can't help it I'm just not a people person. I don't expect people to rave over me and and I don't rave over them.

My Mom made the comment that she just loves people so deeply. I don't know if I love at all. I am not one to show expression and, really, I don't know how too. I guess it takes all kinds.

Happy 2nd Birthday MoMo

Today was Morgans birthday. He is my cousins, Shawna & Cody Koob's little boy. So cute. We all had a great time. It was great seeing Amanda and Craig and their 2 girls. We all went to church together way back in the day. I'll put up pics later if they turned out. My batteries were dying, so not sure what pics took and what ones really didn't. A good time was had by all. The kids loved the water!!!

Pray For My Hair

So, I have been going to great lengths and major expenses to get my hair into a healthier state. It is so much healthier and growing and prettier (thanks John Freida products).

So my hair is naturally wavy/frizzy about halfway curly if I just air-dried it and didn't comb it out and blow-dry it. I am really enjoying wearing my hair down but I hate the wavy-ness and frizzy's, so I bout a straightener. It's after midnight and I am waiting for Katie to wind down so we can go to sleep and I'm going into the bathroom to straighten my hair.

My bedroom is so peaceful, you will never know. It is totally clean, even all my drawers and shelves. EVERYTHING has it's place now and I feel so much better. Next week will be my bathroom and closet. Do you know I've thrown away 3 bags of junk. Just throw pillows that are worn out and clothes I always intended to patch up and repair, they are gone!!! Then our entertainment room got a face lift this morning and it's all squared off just like in my room, no uneven lines or weird angles. So I sat in there for awhile.

I'm sorry folks but I just can't handle circles or swirls or curvy lines. I like very straight, clean lines and squares. It's one of those weird odd things that you get to put in surveys. I have a weird square obsession. LOL. I'm fixing to paint my wall my bed is on in squares. A checkerboard design of sorts. I'm happy because it's going to be so awesome.

Gotta hurry and straighten my hair we're dicussing sleepy time and I'm sharing my bed. LOL.